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Bill Gates VS. General Motors

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Jun 18th 2002#53705 Report
Member since: Feb 7th 2002
Posts: 1564
The final fun thing for today....

Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry
with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up
with technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving twenty-five-dollar cars that get
1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued
a press release stating: If GM had developed
technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you
would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for
no reason, and you would just accept this, restart,
and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left
turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to
to restart, in which case you would have to re-install
the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless
you bought "Car98", or "CarNT". However, even then you
would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the
sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy
to drive, but would only run on 5 percent of the
roads.

7. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning
lights would be replaced by a single "general car
default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same
size butt.

9. The airbag system would ask "Are You Sure?" before
going off.

10. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car
would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you
simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key,
and grabbed a hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a
deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps, (now a GM
subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor
wanted them. Attempting to delete this option would
immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by
50 percent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target
for investigation by the Justice Department.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers
would have to learn how to drive all over again
because none of the controls would operate in the same
manner as the old car.
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Jun 18th 2002#53707 Report
Member since: Mar 24th 2002
Posts: 3114
very old..but still hilarious. :D
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Jun 18th 2002#53721 Report
Member since: Feb 7th 2002
Posts: 1564
Oh, haven't head it before...Jesus, this is hard. I'm testing a new rollermouse thing in order to decide if we're gonna have it. But I'll tell you this takes some practise...
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Jun 18th 2002#53732 Report
Member since: Apr 20th 2002
Posts: 3000
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.


lololololol!!!!!! ooh i haven't heard it before either~ but i like it
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Jun 18th 2002#53771 Report
Member since: Apr 1st 2002
Posts: 1487
yea, i read this awhile ago, still funny.

btw, am i the only person whos computer never crashes? lol, seriously, that's the main reason people make fun of/dislike windows, and it barely happens to me or at school. (then again me and my school are both running windows 2000 which owns 98 and xp :p )
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Jun 20th 2002#54053 Report
Member since: Jun 16th 2002
Posts: 1391
I run 98 and I never crash!
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Jun 20th 2002#54058 Report
Member since: Apr 1st 2002
Posts: 1487
98 still sucks :p
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Jun 20th 2002#54068 Report
Member since: Apr 29th 2002
Posts: 425
i have 2000 pro which never crashed on me once now for about a year..... ME on my laptop which crashes every 10 second... and yeah my brothers souped up 88 civic i crashed once.
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Jun 20th 2002#54074 Report
Member since: Jul 15th 2001
Posts: 2019
I think i've solved that problem with XP never crashing or no "blue monster" crap. the computer just restarts. before i reformatted, the system would start slowing down and get a bit sketchy when opening programs...normally i'm sure i'd see the devil blue screen, but then XP just restarts, and THAT is why you never see it, not b/c of any increase in stability, its b/c the bastards RESTART THE FRICKING SYSTEM CAUSING YOU TO REDOWNLOAD THE FRICKING HALF LIFE SERVER LIST OVER AND OVER till you reformat!!! and bastard javamachine!! *pfft*

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Jun 20th 2002#54078 Report
Member since: Jun 16th 2002
Posts: 1391
ME is unstable. I always used to crash with that piece of trash.
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