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Guide : How to be a Web Designer

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Apr 30th 2002#44870 Report
Member since: Mar 20th 2001
Posts: 3367
http://www.ex-parrot.com/~chris/design.html
To all the n00bies and wannabe n00bies.
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Apr 30th 2002#44879 Report
Member since: Jan 19th 2002
Posts: 800
haha

Once he's finished, make sure you ask him what the web address of the site is (if you call it a `URL', pronounced `earl', the technical person will be sure you are a fellow member of the cognoscenti, and will probably believe that you are higher ranking than he is; he may even bow down to you at this stage
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Apr 30th 2002#44883 Report
Member since: Mar 20th 2001
Posts: 3367
My personal fav

At this stage, you should ignore anyone who mentions things like `average screen size 800 by 600 pixels', `modem', `limited bandwidth', or `256-colour display'. These people are just ignorant techies stuck in the 1970s.
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Apr 30th 2002#44885 Report
Member since: Jan 19th 2002
Posts: 800
ok you just cant beat this one

(If you notice the technical person muttering or if they seem to be holding back anger or irritation, this is probably because they're envious of your Apple Macintosh, which is certainly a much better computer than the lousy PC or Unix workstation they have to use. You'll win a lifelong friend if you let them play some of the many excellent Macintosh games you doubtless have squirreled away somewhere. From time to time the technical person may make apparently disparaging remarks about your work, for example `Where's the content?' or `This will take three weeks to download over a fifty-six K six modem.' This is just harmless banter, and you should respond in the spirit in which it is intended, for example by chuckling: `Ho ho ho!')
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