How you should answer stuff ..

Got this on my email ...


Things I hate about everybody.....

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....
I know where my watch is pal, where the f*cks yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room
for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
F*cking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is.
Why the f*ck would you keep looking after you've found it?
Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?".
No tosser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the f*cking floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".
Didn't really give me a choice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'.
Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short".
What the f*ck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever f*cking does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?".
If the bus came would I be standing here, Knobhead?

10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'.
So what did they used to be? ears, Wellington boots?

11. When your eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?'
No it's really revolting I always eat stuff I hate.

12. People who announce they are going to the toilet.
Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you unless you insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering.....It's has to be a Mc Chicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger get blank looks. Well I'll have a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you McTosser.

14. When your involved in a accident and someone asks 'are you alright?'.
Yes, fine thanks, I'll just pick up my limbs and be off.

Thanks Sidez, like 90% of these kids in here don't have enough sarcasm as it is.

I hate it when people talk about the weather. "It sure is cold today".... Yes, I can feel the temperature also. Thanks for the update though.

Mmm, I remember the first time I saw that like 2 years ago, gave me a nice long laugh. :D :D :D It's weird that something like that is still circulating around.

... and on a more serious note, the only problem in those 14 reasons was:

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*cking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

That saying in the literal sense can be subjected to that arguement, but, the whole point of the saying is to say that when the value of two or more things are equal to each other (in the case of the cake: the outward appearance == the value of eating) it's impossible to benefit 100%. Either way you lose.

Everything else besides that makes sense. :]

i love the mcdonalds one.... I always encounter those retarted staff.

I worked at McDonalds for over 4 years.

OMG...i'd never go that low

all those sound like me
pisses me off when people where i live go outside and say "oh its not bad outside only minus 20" that pisses me off cause thats still hella cold. mind you it averages minus 30

ps thats in celsius cause im a canuck

For more of that type of humor (the good type) either read some of George Calin's (greatest comedian of all time) book, watch his stand up on HBO, or download some mp3's. www.georgecarlin.com

Funny stuff.

Yes, George Carlin is a god.